I don't think that this book is meant as a Professional Journal it is meant for parents...like me...that hear over and over again what a disjustice we are doing to our children by NOT medicating. Well BRAVO to Dr. Stein for standing up and saying that it is possible to have an IA/HM child that can function appropriately...without the use of stimulants.

29 of 31 found the following review helpful:


This program works!  Oct 08, 2002
I bought this book seeking help for my unruly 5 year old child, who certainly fit the ADHD description on the "diagnosis" checklists, but was too young to actually be diagnosed. I wanted to do something about her behavior before she got into school. I was not faced with the medication question at the time, and was hoping to avoid it altogether.

This book was great. The behavior modification program he describes worked wonderfully. It has transformed our child and our family dynamic greatly. What the program does is put the consequences of the child's behavior squarely on the child's shoulders. "Punishment" is a lengthy (10+ minutes) timeout in a boring room. (Spanking is only advocated if necessary in order to get a child to stay in the chair, and then on a very limited basis. It is not a regular part of the timeout.)

The theory, as I understand it, is that this type of child loves stimulation, and the absence of it -- sitting in a chair in a boring room with nothing to look at or do -- is an effective punishment. Instead of pleading with my child or yelling at her or cajoling her, etc., I simply say "timeout" and off she goes. (And yes, amazingly, she does go to and stay in the chair, without being spanked. Don't ask me why, but she does.) At the end of the time she has to be able to tell me why she was sent. I can think of only one occasion on which she really did not know why.

I lent my book to a neighbor whose son fit the general ADHD profile, and she had similar results. She has since recommened it to 5 others.

I don't know how the author's research stacks up scientifically. Again, I was not looking for drug information. But I feel that he at least makes a strong argument against the drugs, and that his behavior program is a good one to try before resorting to the drugs.

It is not easy for a parent to accept that maybe a more effective parenting style works with this child. I have two older children who are well behaved and have never needed this much work to parent. But it was amazing to see how once my child had to suffer the consequences of her own behavior, she was able to turn it around. One example: she had a regular appointment at a place that was filled with toys and so was very difficult to leave when it was time to go home. The people there liked to talk about how she "had trouble with transitions," which meant that I would either spend 5-10 minutes cajoling her to leave, while I and her siblings waited and I fumed, or carry her out crying, again with me fuming. The only person who was stressed out by this scene was me, Once I implemented the CSP program, I would tell her to leave. If she didn't comply, we left under the usual conditions, except I wasn't fuming, because I knew I could address it once we got home. When she got home, I would calmly tell her timeout, and then leave her there for 30 minutes, without telling her why she was going. Every time, at the end of the timeout, she could tell me why she had been sent. It took about three of these timeouts for her to be "cured" of her "transition difficulties"! Then when I said it was time to leave, she got up and came without incident.

Our timeout chair is in the living room, which is an out of the way room. It is a comfortable chair, normally positioned -- not facing the corner or anything. The timeout is not designed to humiliate the child, just bore him or her. You do not yell or scold or constantly monitor the child in the chair. The point is to give the child as little attention, positive or negative, as possible.

The other ESSENTIAL part of the program is praise for good behavior. For example, when she got up and left at the right time instead of lingering over toys, I made sure to note it and praise her for it. She loves all the positive attention she gets. It is probably even more motivating than the boring timeouts. It is real work to constantly catch your children doing things right, but it has a wonderful effect on their behavior.

If you think about it, Dr. Stein's program is really a very positive and hopeful approach, although it may not seem like it on first reading. He says that we should expect reasonable behavior from these kids; that we should not relax the standards for them; that they do not require constant accomodation. In short, expect them to be normal, not impaired. It expects them to able to acquire a skill that all of us need in life: self control. Further, the timeout is based on lack of attention, positive or negative, so parents stop yelling and freaking out. The child might be throwing a fit in the car, but you can stay calm because you know that when you pull in the driveway all you have to say is "timeout."

This book is not the answer for every "ADHD" problem. It does not really address school issues, and I wonder how effective it would be for an older child, say 12+. My daughter behaves much better, but she is still a very "active" kid, so it will not transform a wiggly kid into someone who magically sits still all the time. But overall it has made a huge difference for our family and my daughter. It has de-stressed me and my interactions with her, and has led her to choose better behavior more of the time.

I strongly recommend it for any parent at her wit's end trying to figure out what to do with her child. And if you are considering the drugs, be warned that it does provides a strong anti-drug view. But perhaps weighing all the arguments -- pro and con -- makes for a more informed and sound decision, even if the decision is to use the medication. If you really can't take or don't want the anti-drug stance, just skip the first half of the book and use the behavior program. It is terrific.

28 of 33 found the following review helpful:


Why no Data?!  May 11, 2002
As a graduate student who shares Dr. Stein's concern over the the increasing number of young children placed on methylphenidate, I purchased his book hoping to get a legitimate, empirically supported, behavior program I can offer to parents who are leary about medicating their children. While I will admit that I do plan to incorporate Dr. Stein's CSP (Caregivers' Skills Program) model with parents because I do think it could work, I was very disappointed that the book offered no significant data supporting his treatment. He goes to great lengths to "debunk" what he calls the "junk science" that underlies the pro-Ritalin argument, but when it comes to him offering quantifiable, "good science" data in support of CSP, his methodology is as bad or worse than the pro-Ritalin camp's! Statements such as "I've worked with thousands of kids" or "80% of children using the CSP at home no longer have problems at school" may sound impressive, but anyone who reads professional literature will know better than to trust such vague, unsupported statements. Dr. Stein takes great pains to promote an "us vs. them" debate, where he goes so far as to call Ritalin proponents unethical and borderline criminal. This antagonist stance will not help his cause (or the cause of anyone else who wants to see Ritalin use decrease) at all. If Dr. Stein really wanted to prove his system worked, if he really wanted to demonstrate that Ritalin is not the answer, then he would do good, valid, and reliable research on the CSP. He has published an article, stating that something like 11 of 12 cases improved, but that is a very small sample to base an entire book on. Personally, I would love to see him take that research to a larger scale. I would love to be able to speak to my colleagues and say "See, this works, and the data supports it!" But as it stands now there is no data, so there is no point. I respect Dr. Stein for what he is trying to do. I just wish he would take the necessary research steps to further validate his model.

26 of 34 found the following review helpful:


Needed for some parents, but...  Feb 19, 2005 By K.J "K.J"
"If you're going to err then err on the side of toughness"(p166)
"Do not give warning"

Have you ever known a really hyper and misbehaving child who you thought just needed a little bit of discipline in his/her life? This is the book for them. I would not, however, recommend this book to 95% of parents whose children have been diagnosed with ADD/ADHD.

When I read this book, it scared me. The kind of "parenting" described done to a child with ADHD is abusive, and leads only to frustration, anger, rage and despair, and possibly eventually to life long trauma. How do I know? I have ADD, and so did my brother. No, I am not taking medication. Any medication. And my father believed in the kind of methods described in this book. My ADD has only led me to have trouble in school, and daydream constantly, but my brother who had childhood ADD was not so lucky.

Every day, for twelve long years, my father faithfully followed the methods described in this book, with my brother. Extremely smart and argumentative, my brother could be a terror, and was. He "recovered" at puberty like a third of children with ADHD, and luckily has no long term mental damage from the methods supported in this book. But I do. Almost every day I fled outside, to my room, to the neighbors, anywhere, because of the screams of my brother. Even at age 10, when he was given a "time-out", he really did not understand what he had done. The spankings, the immediate, no excuses, no bargaining, no reasoning attitude could of destroyed him. The house would be filled with screams, pleas, wails, that I was helpless to stop, not from physical but from mental abuse. To my brother, he would at any point be snatched away to be padlocked in a room for no apparent reason, even spanked. He had ADD, and it did not work. Period.

ADD is not a disease; it's just a different way that a human brain can work.
There are lots of methods of dealing with ADD without medication then the ones in this book. If you want to treat a child with ADHD without using medication, get another book about it. It might work, and at least it won't be abusive. If your child does not have ADHD, this book is for you. It really does work, just not for kids with ADD. This book is also not for those who do not believe in spanking kids nine times a day.


See all 18 customer reviews on Amazon.com